And maps are flat… “think about it”… lol
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Hi folks,
As Halloween is soon ending, I will stop procrastinating,stop dithering and send the following [ mostly medically or musically oriented] jokes, puns & riddles out.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!
Q: Why do we carve pumpkins at Halloween?
A: Because they have less blood and aren’t as messy as animals.
Q: What’s a skeleton’s favorite board game?
A: Tibial Pursuit.
Q: Why do skeletons make good comedians?
A: They are two humerus.
Q: What’s the Cause of Death when the gigantic prize winning pumpkin crushed a man to death?
A: He was squashed.
Q: What happens if you combine a vampire and a snowman?
A: You get frostbite.
Q: Why did the ghost go to the bar?
A: To get sheet faced.
Q: What is it like to be friends with a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck.
Q: Why hasn’t anyone ever seen ghost poop?
A: Because it’s invisible.
Q: What do skeletons call a raging fun party?
A: An osteoblast
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they like to eat the fingers separately.
Q: What happens when you goose a ghost?
A: You get a handful of sheet.
Q: What should you give a pumpkin who can’t quit smoking?
A: A pumpkin Patch.
Q: I heard there is a skeleton in your closet!?!
A: No, the body hasn’t decomposed yet.
Q: Why was the vampire in a bad mood?
A: Too many victims with B negative blood.
AND A FEW (somewhat spooky) JOKES AT THE EXPENSE OF US VIOLISTS :
Q: How do you tell the difference between a dead violist and a dead skunk in the middle of the road?
A: Although they both “stink clear up to heaven”, there are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Q: What is A String Quartet Is Composed Of?
A: One Good Violinist. One Bad Violinist. One Really Bad Violinist Who Felt More Comfortable Hiding Out on Viola. One Cellist Who is contemplating turning all the violinists into Jack-o’Lanterns.
Q: What is the definition of a tritone?
A: A violist playing a perfect fifth (since they all clearly are disciples of the Diabolus in Musica )…the rest of you can look it up later !
Q: What’s the difference between a maniac chasing you with a chainsaw and a violist?
A: The monster with the chainsaw will eventually put you out of your misery and has a better chance at blending in a string quartet than the monster with the viola.
* And, a TRULY SCARY PROSPECT:
*
* Q: What Is The Definition Of a Cluster Chord?
A: The viola section all playing middle C.
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Interesting that this is the Poem on the UN building considering the Organization exists to profit from people’s suffering
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The defines reservists, What’s the IDF doing? lol
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Priceless, a picture is word a thousand words and captures the truth in one frame.
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Ohhhhhhhhhhh the irony !
You got me laughing again, David!! Thanks!! 
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Love Nippy Ankleman - thanks!
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