My father referred to this as having a case of the “flying ax handles”. As kids we laughed at this antiquated terminology. I still do. This is one of those situations where laughter is not the best medicine. 
But perhaps creativity is.
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Wouldn’t information and classes on what causes irritable bowel syndrome be more appropriate, especially in a university environment? Drinking too much alcohol is a no brainer root cause.
Have you heard of the Babylon Bee?
Isn’t Babylon Bee the key format and template for all news now?
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